jewwastaken (jewwastaken) wrote,

Can't believe its not butter

Well today(assuming that if you read this you will accept that it is Sunday at 1:52am regardless if you sleep or not)I am packing and moving out of the house.

Kind of been needing to happen for a while, but still its just kind of weird. As silly as it may be I'm 24 and still living with my mom in the basement. I need to move out, perhaps even a year or so ago yet I never did. Either I lost my job, or Pam(The Mom) lost hers and I had to help out with the bills as much as I could. And I kind of coasted through that pattern just enjoying my self for well . . kind of since I was 18.

See due to certain issues when I was younger there wasn't as much social time or good role models for me to have or be around.

But I digress

For one reason or another be it they self inflicted or accidental I have never been in a place where I could for see myself moving out of Pams house. And looking back at the few times where I thought I could for a brief time. . . .Stalling. . . I just took way too much time thinking about if it would work out, can my room mates make rent, can I make rent, will they turn it into a party house, would I slip and do something like that(sometimes i drink to much and it lasts for longer than i'm happy with), will I have a fight with who I live with. . ect, ect. There was always much thought to thoes sort of life changing decisions.

Never really liked change, its scary. Honestly, it pulls you away from your happy warm place, and forces you to renest.

Well this time there was very little thought(well moving out was in the works and has been for a while, but i've been honestly stalling WAY to much), the offer was made, I said yes. With out even considering how this could go, and what could be made from it. Even thou I tried to tell my self(and I believe I even said it out loud when it was brought up), deep down inside I knew my mind was made up.


Not to sure what made me do it.
But all the different sides of me all said yes at the same time.

Lets see where it goes.
I'm kind of excited.

P.S. And yes I know how silly this all may sound but I am rather psyched right now. So be nice and don't poke to much fun.
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